First and foremost, I want to thank one of you who's been supporting my articles since day 1; I really appreciate it from the bottom of my heart. ❤︎⁠

Today’s episode is for the version of you who has done everything right… and still feels like something is missing. 🫶🏼🧿💕

The first quote that appeared in my mind is “You are who you think you are.”

My life had been amazingly great until one day when the word “future” appeared in my head. I got spiralled all over, and my system started to show me what has been coded into the back of my mind about something that is not happening yet, but has the taste of "deadline" inside of it. It turned out, after I'd been doing the “work” that I thought I didn’t need to do anymore, there was still that leftover doubt and fear that was sticking inside about that “destination” of expectation that I had subconsciously been putting inside my head. Shout out to my mum, who made me recognise that “pattern” that I thought was the right one until I was able to untangle the truth behind it.

I think, when you grew up, and you got those words of affirmation when you achieve “something” or you did well, or when the only thing in your head was this world’s approval… It will start growing like a quiet contract you never consciously signed.

At first, it feels harmless. A gold star here, a “good job” there. Little doses of approval, sweet as sugar, dissolving instantly on the tongue. But beneath it, something more architectural begins forming. Your nervous system starts to file a new rule:

I am seen when I perform.
I am safe when I succeed.
I am worthy when I am approved.

And that’s where your identity begins, outsourcing its authority. You become the slave of this world, rather than the author of your own. It will start to create that pattern of looking for another “destination” that you can punch in, rather than living in each situation that is happening to you right now. And eventually it doesn’t just leave you with unworthiness; rather, it leaves you with a quiet, lingering dislocation from yourself. What that means is you will keep outsourcing yourself outward, rather than consciously building from what is happening inside of you.

And the truth that might sting a little is this: you may never feel complete if you’ve been taught to borrow that feeling from outside of you. Instead of being anchored within, you become someone who depends on something, anything, to regulate your sense of self, and that is quietly exhausting. Not just because there’s never an “enough” that sticks, but because you end up living in a constant loop of anticipation, achievement, brief relief, and then an almost immediate sense of emptiness again. It’s not exactly disappointment, but more like a restless, unsettled feeling, a perpetual state where life keeps moving, yet you never fully land inside it. Because your system was trained to keep reaching rather than resting, you begin to believe that completion is always somewhere ahead of you, when in reality, it was never meant to be something you chase but something you allow yourself to feel without needing proof.

It shows up less like one clear emotion and more like these scattered, almost irrational waves moving through you. One moment it’s a random flicker of disappointment you can’t quite explain; the next it’s that strange “pinch me” feeling where everything looks unreal, like your life hasn’t fully registered in your body yet. Then it shifts again; you find yourself upset not because of your own experience but because your parents are upset, or you finally get the promotion and move to a new country, and instead of feeling settled, there’s this quiet disorientation underneath it all. All of these are happening through you, but your soul is most likely still in the state of “searching” rather than “living” inside it.

Alas, so the truth about manifestation is not about visualising it and getting things done, but it’s about reclaiming authorship over how you experience reality. It’s about how well you trained your attention inward so that you could recognise how you wanted this reality to play out in your own favour. And the way that works well for me is by living as that “main character” of what you would normally expect to happen in your life. You absorb that feeling of completeness and start living the life that is happening to you now.

When you're living your life, the thoughts and emotions need to be in that inner coherence with the expectation of the reality that you want to live in. It’s like your conscious mind is actively selecting what you want to create by putting that feeling of what it will turn out to be consistently until it externalises through your eyes. However, it is not about you controlling the outcome by continually forcing yourself to think of that specific outcome you want to experience, but solely staying in that feeling of yours, and eventually it will start to crystallise about what you truly want this reality to provide you with.

It’s about becoming someone who no longer needs life to prove anything to feel real, because your internal belief about yourself has already settled the case, so reality stops being something you question and starts becoming something that quietly confirms what you already know. It is like you letting life show you who you truly are without you intervening at that moment. Reality becomes something that you are excited to live inside and express. The more you are loyal to your character, the more life will start giving you the reward that you once asked for. It is like when you can see through those different lenses of how this world works; that’s where you start to see that your new inner belief starts to grow inside of you, and you most likely will find yourself doing something that you’ve never expected, leaving something that once kept you alive, starting to create more things consciously, and prioritising that alignment between your body, spirit, and mind.

These are the things that I never knew I had with me all along that were able to keep me moving forward towards my purpose. I learnt that when you become fully conscious of what you do in life, every movement becomes something that I focus on, and life becomes like constant feedback for what I am asking for. The key is to be fully intentional about what you are putting into your life. What you are doing now is coded as that “future-self” of yours. It’s never about how often or hard you do it, but rather how certain you are about what you are doing in life that will lead you to something that you want. The truth is, everything you want is already yours to begin with. It just needs a little bit of a “conscious little spark” that you do each day in that direction. Sometimes, it takes that “movement” straight away to gain that clarity afterwards. It just needs to do that one small step based on what your inner vision has, and you let life show you through the movement that you did. Because there is never such a thing as “waiting for a perfect time” when your inner self already keeps giving you that signal of the feeling of incompleteness. In fact, you should take that as a favour for you to take that leap of faith towards the things that you want.

When you begin to see that, the world stops feeling like a puzzle you need to solve and starts revealing itself as something already open to you… And you move towards your manifestation the way a tide returns to shore—quietly, inevitably, without needing to be told where to go. 🌊

When something happens, and it doesn’t feel good, the instinct is to quietly turn it into an identity, to let it define who you are without even realising it. But there’s a different way to meet it. You simply feel it, as it is, without rushing to label or attach it to yourself. You allow the moment to exist as just a moment, not a meaning about you. And in doing that, you’re training your system most honestly, showing it that not everything needs to become you. That emotions can move through without leaving fingerprints on your identity. This is how your internal belief system begins to crystallise, not through force or repetition, but through lived proof until it becomes your default way of being.

From that moment, one day you will be a living proof as someone who creates life by becoming the author of your own life, and reality will be that messenger of what you’ve assumed about who you truly are. ♡ ⸜(˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶)⸝♡

Your Subconscious Bestie,

Liona